All I want to do is go out and do my own things. I don’t need to tell you what I’m doing. Nor do I need you to give me shit to do. I’m not in the mood to go all the way to the valley to deliver gifts. I’m not in the mood to see any family, despite me liking them. I need a reprieve from family today since everyone will be over tomorrow and I’ll be stuck with a huge headache. And don’t fucking tell people I’m coming over to their place before asking me. It’s rude to make plans on my behalf.

I want to go see friends, spend time with them. My job was to get gifts for people. I did extra by wrapping and labeling them. The rest is up to you. Don’t tell me to deliver shit to your friends. If you want to buy gifts for them, go ahead, but it’s your responsibility to give it to them. And don’t shove me out the door when I haven’t even eaten.

I’m just irritated over the shit she keeps doing and not realizing how selfish and mean she’s being. I’m almost 21 years old. My life choices should be my own. I shouldn’t be forced to choose between going to Arizona for new years and being a DD for two drunks (her and Eileen) or staying at home to watch and take care of the motel and being stuck there 24/7 for the whole weekend while she boozes her ass off there. Neither choices are appealing. Especially since I told her that same morning that I have plans. Thanks for remembering. Do what you want, bit don’t drag me into your shit and expect me to fulfil your responsibilities so you can get away. I already did that for two years of my life. I’m not home to take care of your shit. If you want to go to Arizona, go ahead. But find someone else to look after your shit.

I can never do what I want when it comes to her. I have to follow her plans, her life. I’m never allowed to do what I want. This is why I moved away. To get away from her. The jokes on her though. She fully expects me to move back home after graduation. I’m not doing that. I’m moving away from her. I just want to disappear from this life and start fresh. Have no family ties. It would be a dream.